Best. Motivator. Ever.

There is nothing quite like having your child scare the bejeezus out of you to inspire positive change.

My cholesterol numbers were enough to shock me into vegetarianism the day that they were sent my way, but I didn't want to give up anything else immediately. It has been my experience that making one or two changes at a time and then waiting a few weeks until they become solid habits tends to make them stick. Once one or two habits are solidified, then I move onto another one or two changes for the next several weeks. Giving up or changing too much at once tends to feel more unmanageable for me in the long-term. Unfortunately, giving up anything beyond meat and junk has been difficult so far. I crave dairy and sugar like nobody's business when I'm nursing, so although these are the next two logical cuts, I had yet to make either because... it's HARD. (Yeah, I'm a total whiner right now. There is really no other word for it.)

But, because the universe is braver and smarter than I am, it gave me some SERIOUS motivation this week. Because sometimes you just need something greater than you to kick you in the ass. A lot. Which is annoying, but true.

Eleanor had been acting uncharacteristically fussy for a few days. I figured she was just reacting to her bone marrow shot frequency, which had increased last week. Her shots cause (among other things) bone pain, so I figured that the fact she was super uncomfortable was due to that. But then she also started biting me. Baby girl became baby dinosaur and there was literally no time of day that my chest didn't hurt. She bit me so much and so violently that the residual pain actually kept me up. Something was clearly bothering her, but I wasn't sure what was going on until Mark was changing her diaper and called out loudly, "Uh, you need to get in here!" Jellybean had a diaper full of blood.

Clearly, thinking that Eleanor doesn't have enough character-building obstacles in her life to overcome, the universe handed her this. We are still in the process of figuring out what is going on, especially because her blood counts are ridiculous. I won't bore you with details, but my eyes nearly fell out of my head when her pediatrician handed me the one-sheet. We are going to Children's tomorrow and hope to have some more answers soon. But in the meantime, standard protocol in this situation is to take the nursing mama off all dairy, because this kind of reaction can signal a severe allergy to dairy protein. So, I cut dairy cold-turkey, no questions asked. There is no better motivator than knowing that your actions will help someone you love.

But for future reference universe, when I need a kick in the pants, HANDS OFF MY KIDS. I will do my best to be a better listener and be more responsive. Use my kids as a motivator in this way again and you and I are going to need to have a serious discussion...